What’s my response?

Can you believe it?  Palm Sunday is in two days – and then Holy Week.  Time seems to move so rapidly these days.  That’s one of the reasons I like Centering Prayer.  There are times when, at prayer, the world seems to stop for a bit while I am consciously being still with God. I need this time.  Early this week, as I sat down to pray, I felt stressed.  I haven’t quite recovered from all the turmoil of the last few months.  I murmured, “I so need you, Jesus.  I really do.”  Bubbling up from somewhere inside me I hear, “I so need you, too.” What was that?

We know, as Teresa of Avila says, that Jesus needs us to be his earthly hands and feet, but I don’t really think this was what Jesus was trying to say. I understand hands and feet, but God who created everything from nothing but his Breath and his Word needs me “just because” is hard to wrap my mind around.  Jesus loves me, yes. Chases after me, yes, but needs me (?) So, I ponder.

St. Augustine said, “God loves each of us as if there were only one of us.”  Someone said that if God stopped thinking about us, you or me, even for a minute, we would cease to exist.  I often say, “God loves you (us) and there is nothing you can do about it.”  And, it is true that he asks us to be his presence in the world – God with skin on. But I still think there is more. He could have scrapped the whole people project from the beginning and at any time after the Garden rebellion, but he didn’t.  He wants, loves and needs us whether we can wrap our mind around that or not.   Have you ever considered that Jesus wants to spend time with you; that he wants you to be with him—to sit together, to visit together and to love—only to be and not do anything else for the moment?  Awesome!

Does this have anything at all to do with Holy Week?  Maybe it does. There are scriptural accounts. Many times Jesus asked his apprentices (disciples) to come away with him and rest.  But in the Garden, the night he was arrested, he has taken them to be with him.  Matthew 26: 36ff gives the story.  Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane; and he said to his disciples, ‘Sit here while I go over there and pray.’ He took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be grieved and agitated. Then he said to them, ‘I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay awake with me.’ And going a little farther, he threw himself on the ground and prayed, ‘My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I want but what you want.’ Then he came to the disciples and found them sleeping; and he said to Peter, ‘So, could you not stay awake with me one hour?’”  Twice more, Jesus came to be with them but they were asleep.

These next few days, beginning with Palm Sunday, give us the opportunity to be present to Jesus on his journey to the cross. The Church provides the lovely gift of Holy Week services—beautiful liturgies to help us be intentionally present to Jesus.  We attend these to re-member his real presence with us, to remember his suffering and sacrifice for us, but also because he wants those he loves to be near him.  If we listen, we might hear him say, “Could you stay awake with me one hour? I so need you.  I really do.” Have you considered how you will respond to that question?  Have I?

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